Many of us have something happen in our lives that will be eternally cemented into our being. For some it may be the day they were married, for others it may be the day that they graduated. These days impact us so deeply that we are never the same person from that point on.
For me, today is the anniversary of that day. On this date three years ago, I watched my father fade into the dark.
It was a very tragic and shocking event for me, and my viewpoint about many things changed that day. I have read that some people grieve for some period of time, then move on with their lives, and I wonder if they ever are truly over it.
At first, I was completely miserable and focused all of my time onto trying to forget. Unfortunately, I was surrounded by reminders of him and very frequently broke down in tears and screaming fits whenever at home or working a job that I knew I could never do as well as him.
My father's funeral was very touching, with a eulogy written and given by one of his closest friends that he had known for over 30 years. It was attended by more people than I had thought to expect, with at least 120 family and friends in crowd. While the eulogy was absolutely perfect, I feel that I have never made my peace with everything.
He was an amazing man. He was easily the most intelligent, insightful and kind person I have ever known. I have learned from him that we should all derive great joy in helping others, and lend a hand whenever possible.
He never complained about trivial things, except for when a show sucked or when the volume was too high or low. He loved to debate ideas and viewpoints, and despite always having his unique perspective, had a way to help you appreciate that even if you disagreed with him.
He had multitasking down to an art, with the ability to watch the news, read the paper and possibly a book as well, all the same time. He was a man who knew the value of a dollar, and appreciated the ability to leave that dollar in his pocket by having free samples and reading a book while sitting on a couch at Costco.
He was always there to help me and would do whatever he could if he felt it would benefit me.
I look back and cherish the times we had together, like when we went to Zion and the time we went to Sea World and all the car shows we went to. He may have not been in the best shape, but we would still throw the ball around.
I loved my father dearly and truly cant express how much I miss him. I know that even though he may have fallen in less than prime circumstances, I will see him again someday and will get the chance to express what I never took the time to say.
I can wait for the day when we can finally sit down and have a beer together. This one's for you dad, I love you.
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